Perfectionism messing with your money, ease and pleasure?
In my last post I talked about toxic positivity and the bullshit idea that we can only show up when we feel "high vibe" or else something bad will happen. Ugh.
I talk about how we get to feel the fullness of our humanity instead, and this is what actually HELPS us run 6 figure pleasure based businesses, do activism work, have nourishing relationships, and more.
Feeling our feels actually helps us get what we want.
Because when we are willing to feel disappointment or embarrassment, we are brave enough to try things.
A lipstick seal with the letters L O V E separated by crossing lines.
But you may be wondering,
But how I am supposed to show up when I feel like shit?
Sure, often it's very important to just rest. To take breaks. To ground in pleasure. Before, during and after doing anything hard.
However, sometimes what is making us feel like crap is just perfectionism.
Perfectionism is a social construct that says:
We must do it well the first time and every time or not do it all.
Our worth and our safety is determined by how perfectly we can execute something.
We will be discarded, embarrassed or punished if we don't perform flawlessly.
Essentially, perfectionism says there is no room for our humanity, which is full of mistakes or errors.
Perfectionism dehumanizes us.
This dehumanization impacts our businesses, our relationships, and our lives.
It makes writing marketing emails exhausting, showing up on instagram terrifying, and designing our courses a mind fuck.
So of course it's hard to show up or be consistent!!!
The good news is it's not you and there are ways to disrupt perfectionism.
In the Glimmer, my pleasure based business mastermind to help you bring in more money, ease and pleasure that just opened for enrollment, one of our core principles of methodology is to:
Build Shame Resilience and Disrupt Perfectionism. A way to make consistent money in a sustainable, pleasurable way is to let ourselves be messy and make mistakes. We don’t make our businesses about our worth because our worth is inherent. We let ourselves experiment, play and learn. We are more focused on learning and serving others than on how perfect we are perceived.
Some tips to disrupt perfectionism:
never make your business about your worth. Your worth is inherent. Choose something else.
Surround yourself with people who see your worth and will cheerlead you regardless of what results you are currently getting or not getting. Aka the mastermind!!!
Instead of avoiding making messes, learn to trust your ability to clean them up. As Julia Wells says, "I don't have to get it right, but I can make it right".
Practice purposely making mistakes! Leave in spelling errors, allow yourself to only spend 10 minutes on some posts, launch your course without your sales page having every single detail and notice that you in fact, didn't die.
Focus more on serving your big fans than on how you are perceived by your critics.
Make showing up really, really fun (more on that soon!)
So that you can…
have the freedom to show up just as yourself.
make consistent money even when your emotions aren’t consistent.
let pleasure be infused every step of the way.
If you are wanting 6 months of intimate group support, spots are already filling up (we only have a max of 12 spots), so claim your spot in the Glimmer!
with big big love,
luna xx